For next year’s trick or treat, here’s a suggestion. Have a drawer box, show it empty as they walk up, maybe with a sad lonely wrapper inside, then reveal the candy.

Or, if you’re a psychopath, show king sized Snickers and Twix then do the change the other way.

Some other tricks for psychopaths on this night of evildoing:

Dual reality, for the colorblind.

PK touch routine, for the fully blind.

Cause a shutdown in someone with trauma or autism for a flawless rapid hypnotism induction!

Alright, that’s enough of that edgy shit. Please don’t do these, except maybe if you know they’d get a kick out of it. Not counting the last one. Never do that.

Posts every day for the first five days of November, everybody. No reason in particular, besides that we just know only reading our beautiful words twice a week is a downer. Plus, we’ve got a special trilogy dropping over these next three days.

Until then, happy Halloween.