I have been a bad magic student. Up until recently I have largely neglected reading the Vernon classics, but I have been working to right that wrong.

Vernon’s work contains a lot of valuable insights, but perhaps the most important thing I have learned so far is that Vernon had a pet monkey. I had never heard anyone mention that The Professor had a pet monkey, but this seemed like an incredibly strange detail to leave out. The Dai Vernon Book of Magic treats this fact as inconsequential, only briefly mentioning that the monkey was part of why the harlequin act was not a financial success and that they destroyed Vernon’s apartment.

Of course, such a fascinating bit of history cannot simply be ignored. Much like the protagonist of a Lovecraft story, my sanity was thrown to the wind in the pursuit of obscure knowledge. Unfortunately, the life of this monkey was not written in the same painstaking detail as that of Vernon.

According to “Dai Vernon and the Harlequin Act,” the monkey in question was named Compeer, allegedly so because of its supposed resemblance to members of The Society of American Magicians. Compeer seemed to have two roles in the harlequin act. The first was for Vernon to throw a coconut into the air which would turn into a monkey, the second being for Compeer to appear on stage dressed in a similar manner to Vernon for the climax of the act.

However, it seems that Compeer had more in common with magicians than looks. Whenever it was on stage, like most magicians, it could not help but masturbate in front of the crowd. Compeer’s habitual masturbation meant that it had to be cut from the act and Vernon only got to employ the silly little assistant a handful of times.

Sadly, the fate of the lovable monkey remains unknown to me.

Vernon is not the only notable magician to mention having a pet monkey. In a letter to Al Baker, Ted Annemann deviates from the feud between the two in order to lament the loss of his monkey companion. There is regrettably even less information about Annemann’s monkey other than that it died in Alabama, loved to romp around in magic props, and was laid to rest in a die box. I could not find records of Baker asking any follow-up questions about this frankly bizarre tangent, nor could I find more records of Annemann even owning a monkey. There are many strange mysteries in magic, ranging from the true identity of Erdnase to the mysteries of Dr. Hooker’s Rising Card, but perhaps none so bizarre as Annemann’s supposed monkey or where all of these magicians were even getting pet monkeys.

Magic is a strange world that often attracts strange people, the kind of people who would dress up like clowns and have a monkey spank the monkey on stage. Sometimes when revisiting magic books you find strange stories from the past. Magic history is often rich and complex, and sometimes it is just strange and silly.

Please, email me if you have any further information regarding these monkeys.